feelings

people like me
do not wear our hearts on sleeves.
our feelings are buried deep within.

we do not fuss or shout
or crave attention.
our feelings are buried deep within.

we endure quietly
stolidly ploughing life's furrows.
holding on with patient determination.

that does not mean
we like to be ignored.
we too  appreciate kindness.

acts of love sink deep.
are held in those quiet places
deep within.

July

A mixed emotions month – but then, isn’t every month like that?

The first week of July was the last week of school... packed with prizegiving evening, school concert and a lot of tidying, clearing out and packing up. Fortunately, the latter was really easy – I have had an AMAZING class this year who are capable, helpful, sensible, efficient, well-organized, co-operative and wonderfully eager to do anything they are asked. Getting the classroom sorted was surprisingly fun.

Prizegiving, on the other hand...oh, every year it is the same. The delight on a child’s face when the prize is announced; the pleasure from other children when they see their friend sit down, proudly clutching a prize; the disappointment which hangs in the air when all is over and the MAJORITY of the children go home with nothing.  Yes, I know we can’t all win prizes and most of the teachers try to spread them around all the deserving children, rather than awarding several prizes to one child: often, there are several contenders for the same award. Yet perhaps there should be a policy that every child who is leaving is recognized for at least one achievement...? There are many arguments for and against this tradition, but the lesson that ‘not everyone is necessarily a winner’ is a hard one to learn and perhaps needs to be taught in a different way, i.e. that ‘everyone is a winner at SOMETHING’.  We encourage children to explore and develop their talents and gifts – so perhaps we should continue to develop this across every aspect of school life.

I could carry on ranting about this for a long time. On to happier things.

End of term finished very happily. So satisfying, as a teacher, to know that children have benefited from being with me: when I see huge progress in communicating, as children who were hesitant about speaking, reading or writing have gained confidence. Sometimes, I can almost see them grow physically as their self-belief blossoms. I know they would have made progress with anyone, really, but I love looking back to the beginning of the year and seeing the strides they have made...

Once term ended it was catch-up time – with cleaning, with chores left undone, with unlimited reading, with friends and even school-work!  The weather wasn’t great the first couple of weeks so I was happy to put in the hours on my computer and start preparing for next term. I know by the time I get to the end of August that I will have ‘wound down’ big time and it is always a huge effort to start The Teaching Machine going again.

So, all caught up for the end of the month when my dear friends arrived for their annual visit – and the weather turned wonderful.  July weather at last.

(I haven't mentioned the Olympics. The Olympic Torch flew in to Guernsey - great excitement. As for the games,,, I'm glad, in a way, that we don't have television - I wouldn't have made it outside into the garden for a fortnight, though I have sussed out how to watch on iplayer while sitting comfortably on the lawn...)

A quiet joy...

Our yearly reunion came round again, eventually. It always seems both long - and short - since we last met up. Words are not enough for our relationship.  It feels like family. It feels like best friends. It feels as if, sometimes, these friends know me better than I know myself. Safe. Loving. Accepting. Joyous. Peaceful. Enough.

Ann, Cath, myself, Mary - barbecue supper...

...and fruity al fresco breakfast.

The Church of Christ the Healer - with God, all things are possible.

Meeting up again
just a year ago
we walked together, laughed together,
celebrated
a friendship endured
across years
across countries
across continents.
These friends 
who know and are known.
Truth tellers.
Masks off, souls bared. No pretence.
Women who ask real questions,
listening to unspoken yearnings, doubts, loves.
Questions answered in honesty
to know and be known.
There is no sense of urgency.

We live in the moment, THIS moment. 
Gazing back at shared experiences, looking forward 
to an unknown future, 
LIVING, together, in this moment.
Finding healing together.
After they left, I felt bereft, momentarily
until the gap closed
and normal life resumed once more.

Jumping June!

July already well under way and I haven't yet paused for breath.
Yes, end of term.
so June...
Juggling 'normal' class teaching with writing reports (only 8,500 words this time...), completing the school gardening club scrapbooks (spending every available moment on selecting photographs, cutting, pasting and labelling) and going to a presentation ceremony for the local Conservation Awards.
Undergoing the ordeal of being filmed for our school website. I got to know the film crew rather too well when they pitched up in my maths lesson, then gardening club at lunchtime and finally in our Art lesson.
Nothing in school has thrilled me quite as much as seeing the progress the children have made this year. Their art work in particular has been stunning - they have produced amazing fabric designs, trying out all kinds of embroidery stitches for effect. Wow.
Ended the month with our annual trip to Manor Adventure Activity Centre in Shropshire. 5 days, 4 nights of fun activities from abseiling to wandering around the underground maze. Travel back in time to a Victorian village and sleep deprivation came as bonuses.

It wasn't all just about school. We celebrated the Queen's Diamond Jubilee and gained a fantastic overview of the events of the New Testament with Walk Through The  Bible.  I started a Bible study on the Proverbs 31 woman with friends from our monthly breakfast group. A friend got baptized. Another had a serious operation. Joys and sorrows...

Random questions to get a dinner conversation going...

Found some random questions to get a dinner conversation going...and added a few more...so recording them here for reference.  (Am convinced my laptop is going to turn up its toes and die soon, so best to store online!)

1. What is your favorite color?
2. If you could teach a dog a new trick, what would it be? 
3. Do you enjoy singing? How about just in the shower?
4. If you were a superhero, what would your superpower be?
5. Can you do a cartwheel?
6. What is your favorite sound?
7. What would you do with £30.89?
8. Do you have any weird tricks? (i.e., double jointed? wiggle your nose?, etc.)
9. If you had to give up one of your five senses, which would it be and why?
10. Do you have a favorite Bible verse? What is it?
11. Which do you prefer: car, boat, or airplane? (money is no object)
12. What is your earliest memory?
13. Why did you come here today?
14. Who do you most admire, and why?
15. Where would you like to live?

May I remember May...

May began with a long-awaited event - since May last year, to be precise. New Wine Guernsey.  I always love it - modelled on the week long event in Somerset but held over a weekend. This year, speakers were Greg Haslam from Westminster Chapel and Mark Bailey from Trinity Church, Cheltenham. Both fantastic speakers. The music was excellent but most encouraging was seeing 700 Christians from across the island gathered together to worship. Just a wonderful weekend.
Liberation Day - annniversary of Guernsey's relief from the German Occupation - with friends.
New Wine Training Partnership morning - I have, at the moment, no intention of taking on this rigorous part-time study but the morning of teaching from Chris Pemberton on leadership was thought-provoking and inspiring. And then a lovely afternoon tea with friends from my Ladies Breakfast group...
A full day's course to support my job as PHSE coordinator...much to think about; a wedding in the UK - and then, on my return, I started to think about School Reports. In intentional capital letters.
By the time I had finished, I had written approximately 8500 words.
Hmmm.....

Pickle performs

'Down!'

'Praise the Lord!'

'Let's dance!'

'Give paw', 'Sit' and 'Stay' coming later...