September reflections

Just over halfway through September and the warm weather continues.  Despite - or perhaps because of - the start of term, summer days have carried on as if there is no other way to be. Surely this is Someone's Law? The Law which says that September will be hot and sunny as soon as the children go back to school?  This year, more true than ever. The evenings have been incredibly warm: I have been reluctant to go to bed, sitting on the warm stoop at 10pm, watching bats flitting back and forth in the dark.

The mornings have been so beautiful that I have frequently scampered out of bed and along the cliffs before cycling off to school...

From the bedroom window

Gardening has been a delight: cucumbers galore, butternut squash appearing, leeks, spinach, curly kale, potatoes...

School is a new year's helter skelter: new Maths scheme, new English, new way of teaching writing, new children... the last 'new' is all good: it is such a privilege to get to know these intriguing personalities and journey with them over the year.

Richard has been so busy at home: laying new paving slabs for parking; cutting and trimming trees and bushes; fixing our broken bike barn, after the roof of it blew off in a summer storm; repairing my faithful food processor, which stopped working after 28 years...and celebrating 32 years of married life with a beautiful reminder from Cat:

And every weekend has involved hosting friends old and new, getting to know our lovely neighbours...such a privilege to be able to use this lovely house as a meeting place.

#blessed #contentment  #hospitalityissosatisfying

Better a little dust in the corners...

I''ve always enjoyed the email which makes the rounds, the one I call the 'thankfulness' email.  Reminding me of how 'annoyances' are actually blessings: when the lawn needs cutting,  I can be thankful I have a garden to enjoy;  when laundry needs doing, I have a family; when a house needs cleaning, I can be thankful that I have a home to live in. 
So Holley's post Grace for where you are today taps right into that: the unmade beds, dirty dishes and piles of laundry are all evidence that 'people live here'.  From the number of comments on her post, many readers need to be reminded that people and relationships are, ultimately, more important than clean floors.
We all 'know' this. Yet we get sucked into believing lies that performance (efficiency in housekeeping, or doing our job better than others, or...) and appearance (a beautifully clean and tidy house, or fashionable dress and make-up, or...) matter more.
Many years ago, well before marriage and children, a friend - whose home was, in any case beautiful - laughingly told me the Swedish proverb she lived by: 'Better a little dust in the corners than a clean hell.'
I never forgot that. It made all the difference to someone who LOVES Clean, Neat and Tidy. And so yes, there was the odd moment when I got 'beyond myself' over the dirt and the mess while bringing up my children, but that little saying always popped back into my mind before things got Extremely Ugly. (Though whether my children would agree with me...??!)
So it's good to be reminded. Reminded that, although I still get sucked into this unhelpful mindset, it is people who matter more than things.
Always.


PS Bonnie's post over at Faith Barista chimes in with remembering God's blessings, too. I especially love her last few words: 
'Remember God’s benefits.

– Remember God’s goodness.

Travel back in time and remember God’s goodness, His faithfulness.

 “Bless the LORD, O my soul, And forget none of His benefits.” Psalm 103:2'

The gift of hospitality

Bonnie's topic this week is The gift of hospitality'. She features Tammy Maltby, author of The Lifegiving Woman, who says: Your hospitality shouldn’t look like anyone else’s. Hospitality really means loving others with your life...hospitality is a message you give others about their value. It is not about impressing someone but rather providing comfort and care. It is about loving others with...
Your cracked dishes
• Your dramatic flair
• Your dinky apartment
• Your fabulous chili
• Your shyness and introversion
• Your soft spot for teenagers or senior citizens or singles or college students
• Your organizational challenges
• Your impossible schedule
• Your grubby kitchen floor
• Your Oriental rugs
• Your geriatric poodle and overly affectionate cats
• Your knack for decorating
• Your offbeat sense of humor
• Your tendency to run late
• Your perfectionist tendencies
• Your late paycheck
• Your unruly toddlers or sullen teens…or empty nest

Oh yes, I totally agree. Hospitality is about creating a welcoming place for others in my life.
Hospitality means...
taking time to notice when I need to 'invite someone in' to my life
offering my limited listening skills
putting my own agenda aside
opening up my heart
making myself vulnerable
holding the door wide open.

Yet hospitality is also about...
taking time to invite someone to share food
offering up my finances to take a friend out to coffee
putting my need to write aside
opening up my home
making myself vulnerable with a home that is not perfect
holding the door wide open.

Yes, I thought Tammy's post inspiring. So I looked up her blog... and then her wise words of 'Everything you are—your personality, your resources, your circumstances, your talents and spiritual gifts, even your particular failings and challenges—can be used by God to do his kingdom work of hospitality.' flew out the window. She is awesome - no surprise that she is so successful at hospitality! Feeling totally inadequate by comparison, I wondered how on earth I really COULD be as hospitable as her.

I find it really quite hard to believe that my sunk-in-the-middle cakes, second-hand furniture, chipped china and inability to 'pretty up' a table can actually help make others feel at home in my life. Yet I need to remember that hospitality is not about me.

However good a cook I might, or might not be, however beautiful - or not - my home, it's not about putting on a good performance. It's about putting others first. Heard that somewhere before? As it says in Philippians 2:3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.

So yes, I can enjoy putting on a breakfast. Or having people to stay for weeks on end, as I have just done - the house has seen more cooking, cleaning and washing of bed linen than it has done for months.

But in the end, it's not about me. Just about offering what I have to Jesus, letting him use it for his glory. I hope.

The Reluctant Entertainer’s Ten Commandments of Hospitality

Lovely title for the Reluctant Entertainer's blog. What great reminders these 10 commandments are! Though I have to confess to feelings of smugness: I have adopted these for years. Nevertheless, I break number 7 frequently and must remember not to do that: it's embarrassing for my guests.  Hmmm.

1. Hospitality is not about you. It's about making others feel warm and welcome.
2. Plan ahead, be organized, and know your recipe. Learn to delegate.
3. Set the mood. Keep ambience and the five senses in mind.
4. Avoid perfectionism. Put fear aside - it's a robber of anything good.
5. Share conversation. Foster friendships by keeping things real.
6. Demonstrate thriftiness. Buying things at cost or learning to pinch pennies makes entertaining attainable on a budget.
7. Don't apologize. It's okay to make mistakes. Learn to not bring them to light in front of your guests; it robs your guests of relaxation.
8. Be creative. Use what you have. Keep things simple.
9. Learn from others. Find mentors and learn to find a healthy balance and keep things real.
10.Life impact is everything. Experience intimacy and meaning in sharing a meal and gleaning from others' lives.

Coffee morning

I had a coffee morning a few Saturdays ago, to raise awareness and funds for Christians Against Poverty – twice as many people came as I was expecting (parking was ‘interesting’) and it raised over £400, including donations from staff members who didn’t even come – very generous.  It was just fun to get people together – breakfast this Saturday!  I hadn't done one before - just baked a few cakes, put out lots of cups, tidied downstairs and cleaned the windows and bathroom - but it was quite easy. I think I could quite happily do a coffee morning every week!